Our hearts have been stretched, we recently found out, but it happened slowly.
Poverty, food shortage, contaminated water, starvation--these words bring images to my mind of children with bulging bellies and scarred skin. They were problems a million miles away that I thought could do nothing about, so I put up a mental wall of protection. If I saw pictures or heard pleas for help, I would ignore them, thinking it was too big of a problem for me to deal with, or I justified my inaction with the idea that the funds were most likely not going to get to those who needed the help, and even if they did, it would be a drop in a bucket. I had heard for years about “sponsoring a child” from Africa or India or the like. It never moved me.
When I was 33 and our daughter was almost two years old, I suffered a miscarriage of twins. At the time it was the most devastating event of my life. My husband and I mourned their loss and couldn’t help but think of what could’ve been. My parents were living in Vietnam at the time, and longed to be with me, to comfort me and help me in my recovery. Since they could not, and since they could never heal the hole, they memorialized our loss by giving a year of education to two children in a developing country. I received a card from World Vision that read, “This gift, given in your name through World Vision, will help ensure that two children in a developing country have the resources they need to enroll in school and build a brighter future.” I thought about our two tiny tiny babies, whom I could no longer help, and I thought of these two children who were benefitting from my parents’ generosity and creative giving. My heart was moved. I still wanted to cry over our babies, but I could also look forward for these children and the new life and learning they would receive. My skepticism was beginning to wane.
Less than two years later, my older brother Tim died. My sister-in-law requested that gifts be given in his honor to World Vision, because this was an organization that was dear to his heart: one that desired to show compassion to the poor and bring justice to the oppressed. Because of my deep respect and love for my brother I was eager to participate in this act of giving in my his memory.
And so World Vision became a part of our lives. We began to receive information in the mail from them, and slowly I began to read it. The needs discussed and the possibilities of help I could offer began to soak in.
That Christmas, the first for our son Henry, we gave a gift of chickens to a hungry family. We got a little bookmark with prayer requests on the back, and our little four year old Elisabeth was happy to “pray for the chickens.” And we also prayed for those who received the chickens.
During this time I also began noticing small, orange magnetic picture frames on friends’ refrigerators. I found out that these were pictures of children they sponsored through World Vision. I began to think seriously for the first time about sponsoring a child. I read about it on the World Vision website--you could choose a child or be assigned a child in their program and send World Vision $35 per month. This money would go towards education for the child, adequate food, as well as community programs.
Meanwhile, our children were growing up in an upper middle class neighborhood with easy access to just about whatever they wanted. John and I decided that we should broaden Elisabeth’s horizons by sponsoring a child. It would be good for Elisabeth, nearly five years old, to see how other people live and even to interact with a young girl through letters. We wanted Elisabeth to learn to be generous.
So just before Elisabeth’s fifth birthday I went to the “Sponsor a Child” section of the World Vision website. On the website we could search for sponsored children by gender and birthdate. In an instant the face of a brown girl with short, skinny braids appeared. She was born on the same day and in the same year as Elisabeth. She lived in Ethiopia. It was not love at first sight, I must confess. I did not think, “Oh look how beautiful and sweet you are.” Actually I thought her name was so strange. Gedamnesh. I wasn’t sure if I could pronounce it. But I selected her and we committed to sponsoring her. We sent $35 per month to World Vision, and began writing letters.
At first, letter writing was awkward for me. What could I write about that didn’t involve my personal possessions, so vast in comparison to what Gedamnesh owned? I found it was easier for me to type my letters and then copy them out by hand. By the time I wrote to Gedamnesh it was nearly Thanksgiving. Elisabeth had already sent a note and some pictures. I wrote about a couple of our favorite dishes for Thanksgiving, and I wrote about the kids playing in the leaves. Usually our letters crossed in the mail, so it was difficult to keep track of which letter she was replying to. Her letters were full of gratitude and warm greetings to my family and friends.
Warmest greetings to you and your respected family! How well do you get along with your family? My family friends and I are so well.
At the end of the letters were always these words, “Written by project worker as your child speaks.”
The first Christmas of our sponsorship we wanted to give an additional Christmas gift, and we had read online that if we sent a gift of money for Gedamnesh to World Vision, they would send the money to the local project in Ethiopia, and the project workers would discuss with Gedamnesh’s family how best to use the money. Elisabeth was disappointed that she could not pick out something from the World Vision gift catalog and have it sent to Gedamnesh--she wanted to send chickens--but I explained to her that the project workers would find out what she needed most. I imagined it would be a set of clothes and maybe something for the household. We had to wait a long time for the letter from World Vision telling us how the money was spent. I was so curious to find out what we had gotten her for Christmas. Finally in February or March we received this letter:
Dear Laurel Stevens,
How are you and your beloved family doing? I hope you all are doing great. Here my family and I are doing well. Thanks to almighty God.
Recently, we have received a kind gift of 150 USD through project worker of World Vision. It is equivalent to 1485.35 Ethiopian Birr, which is a lot. Thank you very much.
After holding through discussion together with the project worker how to use the money. Thus we purchased the following list of items according to our prioritized needs.
- One heifer
- One complete set of clothes
- One pair of shoes
- One blanket
- One pair of socks
Oh how I appreciate your gifts. Your help makes a change and improves our life. Now our life is changing and improving. What we can give you in return is that praying to your God. He can repay you back. God bless you. Hoping you peace.
Your sponsored child,
Gimbaru, Gedamnesh
Written by project worker as your child speaks
***
I stood there holding the letter, staring at the words, “One heifer” over and over. I was humbled. We had begun this experience by committing to send money and write letters so our daughter would learn about another way of life, and learn to share. Now I was seeing just what a little bit from us could do. It began great things. I suddenly felt more invested in Gedamnesh than I ever thought I would. This wasn’t just piddling around. This was buying an animal for her family that would in turn produce other animals and give them milk.
The letter came with a picture of Gedamnesh wearing her new clothes and holding a blanket. Her father stands with her. He is holding a rope and in front of them both stands the heifer.
We continued this tradition of sending money for a Christmas gift, and each year Gedamnesh and her family received a heifer in addition to clothes and other items for Gedamnesh.
When Henry turned four years old we decided that we would sponsor a second child and I looked for a boy with Henry’s birthday. I looked in Ethiopia for one born on the same day and year as Henry, but instead we were presented with Tigist, born on Henry’s birthday, but just a little younger than Elisabeth. In the intervening months we have received one letter and are working on building up our relationship with Tigist.
In May of 2011 Elisabeth’s class was studying cultures of children around the world, so I asked if I could talk to the class about the children we sponsor in World Vision. I compiled the letters we’d received from Gedamnesh and wrote down some highlights. Elisabeth drew a picture illustrating all the things we’d learned about Gedamnesh’s life. The children of Elisabeth’s class asked good questions and the teacher was delighted to learn (to her surprise) that World Vision, a Christian organization, helps children of all religions and cultures all over the world. Afterwards I realized that working on and making the presentation showed me how attached we had become to Gedamnesh over the past three years and how much we’d learned about her.
Then in October we received shocking news. Due to government changes in Ethiopia, World Vision was no longer able to continue its relationship with Gedamnesh’s project. The project in her village was closing. I received a farewell letter from Gedamnesh and shortly thereafter, the news from World Vision of the closing. I wept and wept. And then I wondered how I could’ve become so attached to a girl I’d never met. She is only just now 8 years old. I was angry at the government that they couldn’t keep up this vital relationship that would only serve to help their people. What would happen to Gedamnesh? Would the projects that were started bear fruit? She had told us in a letter that she wanted to become a nurse. I was so happy to be watching this little girl grow up and to see possibilities of helping others. Now I wondered if she would reach her goals.
I realized, however, that though our letters would not reach her anymore, our prayers will still reach God. We know how to pray for her, and she has opened up a new world for us. I exchanged some emails with World Vision and read some more on their website to answer some of these questions.
While we were sponsoring Gedamnesh, she received our letters, and the money helped her to be able to go to school, but the money also helped her entire community. During the time we were sponsoring her, a new water well was built so women could get clean water closer to their homes, and a new school was constructed. Knowing that the community was being built up gives me hope that the work begun will continue to be carried out.
I take comfort in rereading her letter and seeing her appreciation of what has been done in her community and the lasting nature of the projects.
Dear Stevens, Laurel
How are you doing? We all are doing well, thanks to God.
After many years of relationship, time is come to end up our relation. And I want you to know that you did great job here.
I have benefitted a lot from World Vision in various ways. . . It is you who supported us via World Vision and enabled us to live good life. So, I would like to say thank you.
God bless you all.
I wish you love, peace, joy and health.
Gedamnesh
When Gedamnesh’s project closed, World Vision assigned us a new girl to sponsor. She is four years old, born just a few days before Henry. We haven’t received a letter from her yet, but we look forward to watching her grow from afar, just as we got to see Gedamnesh grow from a tiny tiny five year old, to an 8 year old who wants to be a nurse.
What else can I say? This is a good way to give. It brings great joy, but it also hurts. Isn’t that a little bit like the gift that God gave us?
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